me: hi i work for the diaper company

  your prescription has automatically entered you

  into the annual diaper giveaway

  please rsvp for our trust-building seminars

  @ http://www.jennyhastoweardiapersbecauseofherreligion.sex.std

  USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA

  also: http://www.nytimes.com/2008/07/02/us/02detain.html?_r=1&hp=&adxnnl=1&oref=slogin&adxnnlx=1215011029-ldWfi6mB/s/1VAZcCiepYQ

Jenny: hahahahahah! oh man

  cool.

me: uh, no

  YOURE cool

Jenny: i KNOW. oh i DO know that though.

me: cuz

  what im sayeen is

Jenny: so

me: so

  cool

Jenny: hahaha

  my new ipod is as thin as a panty-liner for a teen with three hairs 

  on her pusseta.

  still pals?

me: no more shuffle? that was like an OB for the faggot kid from 

  A.I.

Jenny: no way. i used it as a home pregnancy test

  i read positive for "pussy music"

  i'm def getting an aborty

  my parents think i’m retarded.

  doo yoo sink dat?

me: oh no gurwfren

  me sinks you ah vewy interrijunt

Jenny: i feel so bad for retarded people because their brains are the  

  size of raisins and the rainsin sits in warm soup. right?

me: thats exactly it

Jenny: that's why they're sick

me: i saw on 20/20 that retarded people are allergic to books

  so they are so stupid

  it's part of their dna which they keep in their fannypacks

Jenny: books cause people to go to the bathroom

me: books definitely do that

Jenny: i know

  that's why i keep all of mine in the kitchen

  i poop there

me: where your urinal is

Jenny: hahahahaha

me: hahahaha

  jinx

Jenny: i eat my urinal pucks in my sleep

  when i wake up my mouth is empty of teeth

  omg.

 

Potpourri, w/ Jenny Slate

7/5/08

 
 

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